What Every Military Wife Wants You to Know

My husband’s been deployed for a little over 3 months and there have been a handful of things I have learned about myself, our relationship, and others. I don’t want this to be mistaken for bashing or sympathy, but to help others who know someone going through the same situation.

The day my husband left was the hardest day of my life. I had a very difficult day; I wanted to be selfish. I wanted him to hold my hand every minute before he left, sit next to me during the ceremony, and tell me he loved me over and over again. That may sound terrible to others, but that’s me being vulnerable and honest. I will never forget the first and last hug before he left. I remember like it was yesterday – each of his family members and my family gave him hugs first. Then he hugged his little boy and then he hugged me. The moment we wrapped our arms around each other was a very intimate moment…we wept together. Our little family of 3 walked down the hallway to the room where they all had to meet before his departure. He hugged his little boy, and then me and started to walk away. That was the moment when I realized I had to be strong not only for myself, but for my family.

 

We are not even halfway through my husband’s deployment, but I have already gathered a few things that are worth sharing to others. I know there are many others, but these stick out in my mind the most. If you are currently going through a deployment then you can understand where I’m coming from, or if you know someone who will go through this, maybe you can take a few things I say that will help you.

1)      The most common question: How long is his deployment? – So I say 10 months…this is the most common response I have received. “10 months that’s not long at all” or “really…that’s it?” I understand maybe some people feel awkward, but I would like to ask you a question, how would you like to be apart from your spouse for 10 months. I’m not looking for sympathy, but a simple “okay” would suffice.

2)      Another comment I have received a lot is people stating that my husband is not in the “front lines” so he’s not in any danger. I hate to be blunt, but every position overseas is considered a war zone. When someone says that to me, it makes me think they see no point in what my husband is doing. My husband chose his career because he is a self-less leader. Every day when he walks to work, spends 12 hours working on helicopters, and travels to other cities in the Middle East he is sacrificing his life in a war zone.

3)      Military wives and families don’t want your sympathy. I knew what I was getting myself into. We talked about his career when we had only been dating for a few months and I accepted that as part of my life. That doesn’t make it any easier when he is gone, but I don’t want people feeling sorry for me. I just ask for continued friendships, not special treatment.

To the other wives who will go through or have gone through a deployment, I want to say thank you. Although I know our husbands are protecting us from a far, I think a lot of people don’t appreciate the moms and families back at home. We have to keep things running normal, take care of the kids, tell our husbands we are fine (even if we aren’t), and add his chores to our list. I have chosen to use this as empowerment for myself. Before I met my husband, I lived alone and was very independent. The past 3 years, I have become very reliant on his skill set. He is my Mr. Fix-It…he fixes my car, mows the lawn, and he builds all my Pinterest projects. I have come to appreciate the things I took for granted while proving to myself that I can do the very same things he does.

Over the past 3 months I have cried, found new passions, been fearful of the unknown, and faithful. I have cried out in prayer asking for his safety, talked to my step-son about why daddy is gone, and found myself sleeping in my husband’s favorite shirt to feel safe. But most of all, I have found comfort in doing things that would make him proud. I have always felt that my “job” while he is away, is to be strong. If there is a problem, I will find a way to fix it and if I am sad, he won’t know. That’s not to lead him to think I don’t miss him, but I don’t want him worrying about me when he needs to be focused on his job and safety. So although I have a rollercoaster of emotions, I just ask that if you see me cry, keep walking. I’m not looking for sympathy, but it could be a sweet card he mailed me, or thinking about our favorite sushi restaurant that makes my eyes water. I have found coping by driving my husband’s pride and joy, his truck. I feel like we are together. So when I miss him more than usual, I crank up his favorite country song and just drive because I remember that moment when he left and we cried together. And then I have to smile because I can look forward to the day when he comes home and we are crying because we are both happy he is home.

Cajun Sausage and Black-Eyed Peas Skillet

 

This is one of those, the picture doesn't do it justice. But when I say easy, I mean EASY! This took me 20 minutes from start to finish and was full of delicious Cajun flavors!

 

Ingredients:

 

1 package of Polish Sausage

1 can of black eyed peas - drained and rinsed

1 bag of Bird's Eye frozen chopped peppers, onions, and jalapenos

(You can also buy fresh veggies and chop - this bag just made it much easier!)

Creole Seasoning, Salt and Pepper

 

 

 

In a large skillet, place your bag of frozen veggies on medium heat and cook until tender. If you get excess water in your pan, dump out before you add any other ingredients. While that is cooking, cut your polish sausage into bit size piece and then place in pan along with the rinsed black eye peas. Then add your seasonings to taste. I added about 2 tablespoons of Cajun seasoning to really give it flavor.

You can serve over brown rice or dirty rice if you wish. Makes enough for 4 generous servings.

 

Easy Crockpot Chicken and Dumpling Soup

I have been sick the past few weeks and there is nothing more "homey" than a nice bowl of chicken and dumpling's. This recipes makes between 4-6 servings so you have lots of left-overs for the week on those cold nights.

Ingredients:
1 box of Low Sodium Chicken Broth
1/2 cup of water
2 Chicken Breasts - thawed
1 Yellow Onion - diced
4 Stalks of Organic Celery
2 cups of Organic Carrots - chopped
1/2 can of Biscuits
2 Garlic Cloves
Salt and Pepper

First, season whole chicken breasts liberally with salt and pepper. Place in the bottom of your crockpot. Add chopped carrots, celery, onion, and garlic. Then add your chicken stock and water. Place on high for 4-5 hours or low for 8 hours. With an hour remaining in time, take two forks and shred the chicken in the crockpot. Once the chicken is shredded, then open your can of biscuits and tear apart and place in crockpot with the rest of the soup. After the time has completed, your soup should look like this:

Dig in and enjoy!

 

 

 

 

The Perfect Egg - Two Ways

Eggs have gotten a bad name over the years for supposidly causing high cholesterol which in turn can increase your risk for heart disease. Well, I am not a doctor but I have been advised by several doctors and nutritionists that say eggs are GOOD for you! I'm not going to get into the "science" behind the great egg debate, but if you want more information, I would love to talk with you about it.

Since I have incorporate more eggs into my daily diet, I have been experimenting with how to "hard boil" the perfect egg and how to "poach" the perfect egg.

First, I always use Cage Free Brown Eggs - I think brown eggs have a cleaner taste.

The Poor Man's Poached Egg

I'm just like everyone else - I don't have time every morning to get out the skillet and scramble eggs. So I like to call this a "Poor Man's Poached Egg." I give all the credit to my 90-year old grandpa who introduced this technique to me. Keep in mind he grew up in the depression, so he was always reusing paper plates and finding creative ways to cook. All you need is a small glass peatree dish, paper towel, an egg, salt & pepper and microwave.

Crack one egg into your small glass peatree dish; add salt & pepper. Wet your paper towel - ring out excess water and cover over the dish. Place in microwave.  The trick is to microwave in small time increments - you don't want your egg to explode. The longer you microwave the firmer your yolk will be. I like mine over-medium so I start at :20-seconds, then :6-seconds at a time until I like the firmness. Total time of :35 seconds.

The Perfect Hard-Boiled Egg

I ate all my eggs before I took a picture, but I will give a detailed description on how to make the perfect hard-boiled egg.

Start by filling your pan with enough water to cover your eggs. Gently place eggs in water filled pan BEFORE you turn on the burner. Once eggs are in the water, boil water. Once the water starts boiling, I turn my temperature down to medium-boil. Set timer for 11 minutes.

Once your eggs have boiled for 11 minutes, drain hot water and then run cold water over eggs for 10-minutes. Your goal is to stop the cooking process and get them cool enough to peel.

I have found that peeling the egg before they are competely cool, is MUCH easier. Even if I'm not going to eat all the eggs at one sitting, I peel every single egg. The yolk should be a beautiful light yellow color. (Hint: If yolk is green, you over-cooked it; if yolk is bright yellow, it's undercooked)

Store in fridge up to 3-4 days.

Veggie and Sausage Breakfast Casserole

Healthy Veggie & Sausage Breakfast Casserole

 

Ingredients:

 

10-12 Cage Free Eggs

1 small tomato, diced

Fresh organic broccoli

Handful of Organic Spinach

1/4 Cup of Sharp Cheddar Cheese

6 Turkey Sausage links, diced

 

This is such an easy and forgiving recipe. You could also add mushrooms, onions, and peppers or substitute the turkey sausage for bacon or ham. I just used what I had in my fridge.

 

Preheat oven to 375. Prepare a 9X9 pan with cooking spray. Lightly whisk eggs in a small bowl; add salt and pepper to taste, then transfer to pan.

 

Then, steam your broccoli. I just put about 1/4 cups of water in a skillet on medium heat, added chopped broccoli and covered for 5-8 minutes. Once broccoli was tender, I added the spinach for about 2 minutes. Just enough to make it tender also. Since my turkey sausage is already cooked, I just threw it in a small skillet warm.

 

Add broccoli, spinach, turkey sausage, diced tomatoes, and sprinkle with cheese. (Omit cheese for strict Paleo diet)

 

 

Bake for 40 minutes and you have a health and yummy breakfast! If you want a little kick, add your favorite hot sauce - I use Frank's!